Monday, August 22, 2005

BREAKING NEWS! Salam Pax Has Grown a Beard!

Forget the Constitution Wrangling. Salam Pax has admitted in today's post that he has grown a beard because it's simply easier to live in the New Iraq WITH a beard than without one. Hm, that can't be good, right?
[O]ne of the reasons I grew a beard is because it makes life a bit easier.
And that is exactly how we might end up with something like the Islamic Republic of Iraq because sissy queens like me will start growing beards and stop wearing ties to avoid conflict. Mind you, I do think my beard makes me look distinguished but my A-list Bear looks are not helping the cause.

Brandish your razors and make banners of your ties. Clean-shaven and tie-wearing masses of the world unite!
Jeezus, what's going on?! In Saddam's reign everyone had to wear a Saddamite Moustache. We pull down Saddam's Viagra Statue in Firdus Square and then the Iraqis decide a BEARD in much better than a MOUSTACHE?!

Aliens from outer space CANNOT get here fast enough.

I can already hear the Aliens chuckling over the Shroud of Turin and some guys in a desert walking around an old meteorite. If the Aliens have Trivial Pursuit, the cards that cover the behavior of humans from Earth will be those cards that get the most laughs.

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Okay, if you REALLY want to know how much the Sunnis are going to P*SS on the other Iraqis, check out ITM for the updates. I saw one of the spokesmen for the Sunnis link several outright lies in one long string in front of the reporter. Sunnis actually wanted to vote in January, he said, but were prevented by intimidation. Riiiiiiight. I wonder, then, why most Sunnis later admitted that they had made a mistake by not participating in the January elections. Hm. Is this just the usual static from the APU?

I have to admit that I currently have a rather low opinion of the Sunnis. But hey, prove me wrong, Sunnis.

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Housekeeping Note: I have gone through the blogroll and cleaned out any deadwood and moved those bloggers who have decided to take a break -- Ali Fadhil, Ahmad of Iraqi Expat, and Kurdo -- to the bottom. If anyone has any suggestions for adding blogs, please leave us a note in the comments section.

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CONSTITUTION UPDATE: Stop by Salam Pax's for the latest.

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