Saturday, June 19, 2004

Kick Riverbend out of the Foxhole (or is it Spiderhole?)

Riverbend must have read Iraqi Bloggers Central yesterday, where I complained that it had been almost three weeks since her last blog, because she just blogged.

Have you ever noticed that people without jobs who sit around all day at home are often the self-proclaimed EXPERTS about all manner of topics? Yes, that's Riverbend. She sits at home all day, bitching and complaining, watching Al-Jazeera, and sticking pins in dolls of Paul Bremer.

Have you even seen her Little Red Book? Yes, just like those from Mao's times. It's filled with all the latest sanctioned terms and attitudes. Anyone attempting to guide Iraq in this next phase toward democracy is simply labeled PUPPET. See how easy it is? You should see the evil grin on Riverbend's face as she thumbs her book.

Some of the selfsame Puppets

he was actually selected by the Puppets

the Puppets do not breathe unless Bremer asks them,

Puppets do not suddenly come to life


Riverbend drops her rear onto the sofa and opines:

The new government isn’t very different from the old Governing Council. . . . It’s amusing to watch our Karazai- Ghazi Ajeel Al-Yawer- trying to establish himself.

Really Riverbend? Amusing? You mean like, "Ha ha ...Tee hee"? The GRAND DAME OF BAGHDAD HAS SPOKEN. From here on in, the democratic struggle in Iraq shall be viewed by all Iraqis as "amusing."


Riverbend sits at home -- How many weeks at home now? Three? Four? -- and proclaims:

Iyad Allawi is completely America and Britain’s boy

Oh yeah, Riverbend, we're going to listen to YOU, the Baathist Uber-Beeaatch. Fricking loser.


Riverbend is following a rumor about Yawar:

There are also rumors that he is married to a certain lady who is a personal friend and adamant supporter of none other than Ahmad Chalabi... I'm still looking into that.

Hey Riverbend, I heard that you paid top dollar for a bag of dirt from Saddam's Spiderhole. You keep it as a memento from the last place touched by Saladin Saddam before he was ... um ... forced to surrender to the Evil Americans.

But it turns out that the Spiderhole was dug into one of the mass-grave sites from Saddam's Good Old Days and a few bone fragments were found in the dirt!

I heard how angry you were! Those shit Shia, you screamed, were contaminating Perfectly Good Dirt! You tossed the bones of some Shia or Kurd or Christian out the window for the dogs to eat. Now your dirt is Pure.


UPDATE: Go to the Jarrars' family business website and click on activities. You will see the Jarrars hobnobbing with all the top Baathists. Jeezus! On this page you will see even Dr. Death with the Jarrars! Take a look at the left-hand photograph in panel 10. It looks like Dr. Death to me. Why don't you check it out and let me know what you think. I could be wrong, but it looks like the Jarrars were part of the Baathists R Us club.

Dr. Death: Huda Salih Mahdi Ammash / WMD Scientist / Five of Hearts in the Pack of 55 / Surrendered May 9, 2003.

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